Macabre

When I was in cosmetology school, one of the teachers there talked about working in a funeral home. Mostly she had done it for friends who had passed but also for money. She did the hair and makeup for dead people. When I heard this, bells went off in my head. Balloons flew into the air. Firecrackers shot off around my feet. Me want.

I am an artist. I paint and draw from photographs. I do it well. It's something I love to do and I have done it since I was a kid. And I happen to have a cosmetology license from that time I went to cosmetology school. Passed the test and everything. Not to mention a BFA from that time I went to art school. AND, I'm a big fan of 6 feet under. BECAUSE, I am a big fan of pretty much anything macabre. Not gore. Not guts and blood. Just mystery really. Macabre may not be the right word, but I am a fan of the word macabre.

I love ghosts. I am fascinated with death, not obsessed mind you, just fascinated. And people, people fascinate me. And painting pictures is what I do. I think to myself, is it not a perfect combination? Give me a photograph of someone and give me that someone. The printed living image of their face and the washed out canvas that once displayed the living image. Let me paint it back on. I can do this. I bet I'd be good at it. Let me hang out in the funeral parlor, get to know the funeral director and their family. The families of the deceased. Let me be alone and work magic on the dead. Oh, if I could crack my knuckles, I would. There, I just cracked my wrist. I'm tellin you, this is a job I may be made for. One of them anyway.

First had this idea 4 years ago. 6 months ago, I moved with my husband of 2 1/2 years and our 9 month old baby to a new town and guess what? I live across the street from a funeral parlor.

Almost every time I take my baby for a walk in the stroller or walk out my front door with him buckled into his baby bjorn, I glance over at that funeral home. I think about walking in, with the baby, without the baby, dressed up, dressed down. What is the best way to approach a funeral home to ask if you can paint on peoples faces? I am thinking, dressed nicely, no baby. Or maybe dressed casually, with the baby. After all, I am also their neighbor. Do I bring pictures of my portraits I've painted? What do I say exactly?

For 4 years, I have driven past funeral parlors and imagined going inside to inquire about such a position. What would it pay? Do they all already have someone to do this? Do I have to know how to reconstruct noses and cheekbones with putty?

Before I go in and ask across the street, I thought, I would write about this. I always think after the fact, I should have written about that. This time, I will start off writing. I don't know how long this journey will be. Maybe I'll never go ask. Maybe I'll ask and they'll tell me it's not possible. Maybe it will be the beginning of many years of painting dead people's faces. When I say painting, I mean applying make up. I am guessing it is heavy make up and then also doing their hair. But to me, it would be like painting.

Painting people back into their faces.... oh man.